Monday, February 25, 2008

Old Bats in Red Hats!




Old Bats!!
It was a Saturday Night in Grimsby Ontario. I arrived "right on time" , I am whisked into a green room ( aka an aqua green bathroom) where I dust my face, reapply my lip gloss, and fix my boobs.
I am not following just anyone you know...Its the Grimsby High school Choir!
Pat...the Head of the "Old Bats", asks me if I would like an "introduction" I start to ramble off some "best of...and she fires back "I am old...I won't remember" and so I saunter on to the stage?...
oh?...no stage?, just the floor, and the lights?...full pap smear , floresent , notice the hair on my chin lights!
Pat did manage to remember to tell me that she had invited along a man who is a talent scout...she points to him, the one in the bow tie, and the wife with blue eyeshadow! I see them!
Yes...no "F Bombs"...she tells me " two F Bombs" and he'll walk out on me!
FUCKKKKK!!
I start the set out , by asking for water, I am thirsty, I ate 9 Tim Bits on the drive ( one I save for my set)
So I chug a bit of water, tell them I am tired, that I'd been up since noon...and off we go.
I felt so intimidated...I mean there was a sea of Purple and Red Women...I had taken the time to read about them on their Website...http://www.oldbatsinredhats.ca
This was not your ordinary "Seniors" club...these Women had it going on . There was over a 100 of them, in this tiny little community centre, tucked into the Green Belt of small quaint towns,
God I miss Giant Tiger and God Fathers Pizza.
Anyways...these ladies were Delicious, they were so generous and curious, and I can't wait to be FIFTY!.
and the talent scout took my card! Vegas here I come! on a tour Bus with the Red Hat Society!