Thursday, April 24, 2008

Live from Jasper Avenue...


I am here in Edmonton, slept in til almost 10, wandered down to the Mall to pick up my Pantyhose and liquid makeup. We spent a few hours at the West Edmonton Mall yesterday. It's fun to shop with Men who shop! What a mall, a skating rink , water park, casino, amusement park, its just nuts! But could I find a Shoppers Drug Mart?...nope! nada! I tried octopus, cold chewy green tasting. I think I am just going to keep still today, lay in this king size bed, catch up on the Y&R, listen to Feist, paint my toes, and miss my family.
Whatever will I do when this comedy thing takes me away for months?
I'll take them with me!!
Tomorrow is my last night with the Tour...I knew it would come and go quickly.
I am excited to perform tonight, I have some friends coming, and although I have family here in this city somewhere, I just don't feel like doing that long lost contacting thing. I've estranged myself from most of my "family" this past year, feeling most safe in the company of the friends I have chosen, and with my children and husband. And although I miss my sisters, I don't have that gut wrenching fear based stomach twisting mindset. Living in fear is how we were raised. Nothing is what it seems, nothing will turn out right, the eggs will be broken when you get home, the sound of a screech means one of your children was just hit by a car, the phone ringing means someone is dead, the smell of anything means the house is on fire. The knock on the door is the Germans coming to get us, it was crazy growing up in my house. But the crazy is what brings the need for laughter, and that's why I do what I do. I want smiling faces and hugs and applause and acceptance, I want celebration and glasses cheering and girlfriends out on the town. I want to live in a world where you are able to stop and breathe and know you are exactly where you are suppose to be, and today that place is Edmonton!